I KNOW YOU’RE IN A BETTER PLACE

I still can’t believe that you are gone. The warm hug and smile are so fresh in my heart and mind. I see them all the time. Your funny stories and jokes are so fresh like the lilies in the sea. You watched me as I began to sit, crawl, stand, walk and eventually run. You were present on my first day to boarding school in Primary 1. You saw me in my best and worst moments. You wiped away the mucus off my nose and the tears off my cheeks. I can’t forget your old wrinkled academic reports. You exposed them to inspire us all. You kept assuring us how you went to school so that we could do the same. You were such an inspiration.

Time passed by and soon I was in secondary school. I remember you hitting my buttocks real hard after reading a letter addressed to me from some boy in the neighborhood. He was promising me heaven on earth. And even though I tried to defend myself, you just couldn’t stop hitting me. You were so angry with me. From then on, I learnt that having a boyfriend while in school was a bad thing. And so, I studied all the way until college and met my gorgeous man.

On my graduation day, you were the happiest woman. You couldn’t believe that your little girl had finally graduated. Yes, I can’t forget the way you waggled your waist that day. You even failed to eat. You had so much joy.

And lately, you were demanding for my WEDDING :-) You kept asking me when I would walk down the aisle. You were very excited. I promised you that you will live to see that day. But on the 22nd of July when we took you to the hospital, you seemed normal like any other patient. We had so much hope that you would get discharged. You always kept your smile on even through the pain. We never expected death at all. We all knew we would have you back. The fateful day, 22nd August came and you breathed your last. I remember touching your cold feet and they would move no normal. Your smile and warm hug were no more. You were gone. I am not your biological child but you were truly my MOTHER. My guardian. You raised me up with so much love and care. When everything went wrong, your home was open. Your heart was open but most of all, your arms were open. I miss you MUM.

I cannot tell you my work stress anymore. I can’t tell you my love drama anymore.

Even though everybody says, life has to go on, in my heart, it has failed. How do I move on without you? How do I make all my plans without telling you? It is so hard mum. Can’t you see that?

I know you’re in a better place. You were an angel. You must be up there dazzling in white and seated under Jesus’ feet. I love you mum and always will. It is hard but I hope to meet you in heaven.

GOOD BYE!!!!!

THE POWER OF THE MIND

A wise man once said. “Battles are won or lost in the mind.”

Attitude (positive or negative), Will, Energy, Outlook, Excellence, Success, Failure, Persistence, Self-trust, Confidence, Self-drive, Momentum, etc all come from our minds.

The heart is a fragile creature. It is deep and often takes time to weigh issues, looking at the pros and cons. It never decides. But oh, the MIND has power. It can save you or kill you. It can heal you. It can take you places. But it can also destroy you. We all have dreams and have often set goals in life. But many of us lose our dreams along the way and we do not even get quarter way towards our goal. We often stop on the way and either sit or juggle out something else. Education is very good. It opens big opportunities for you. Friends and family are such a big bunch of support. They encourage us, make us smile and often have our backs when things get out of hand. Environment is such a morale booster. Who wouldn’t want to work in a big, posh, air-conditioned office with pictures of family and friends hanging allover the walls, office messengers bringing you coffee every 1 hour, swinging on the chair, oh my!!! Who wouldn’t want such a life???? But, do these people / things get you to your dream? Do they make you successful?

NO! NO! NO! You may have the best of friends, family, education, wealth, environment, etc but all these will never get you to your dream / success. Your mind will. Everything we do is determined by our minds. Our minds have a lot of power. Doctors recommend that before you start any medication, you must believe that you will be fine. Your mind must trust and believe that the sickness will cure. Some cancer patients have healed because of a positive mind. They just decided to live life and not worry about anything.

Your Mind is the major route to your success / dream / goal.

I have heard so many single people say that marriage is terrible. They have not even got there  yet, but they claim it is difficult. Why? Because their minds say so. I have also heard people say that without education, one cannot become successful. How do you then explain the success of our icons who did not go to college like Mary Kay Ash (Mary Kay cosmetics), Bill Gates (Microsoft), Michael Dell (DELL co.), Halle Berry, Henry Ford, our Ugandan icons like Wavamunno (spear motors), Godfrey Kirumira, etc. Most of these people did not sit down to mourn about their failure to go to school / college, instead, they looked at their strengths and put their minds to them. They gathered their confidence, energy, will, self-drive and positive attitude and decided to explore and go as far as they can. They do not settle for mediocrity. They do not look at their weaknesses. They do not dwell on the past. Instead, they pursue their dreams. They use their minds to go as far as they can. That is the power of the mind.

Life is what you make it. If you choose to be sad, then you will be sad. If you choose to build your talents, then you will reap big. But if you sit back and claim that EVERYTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE, then it shall be.

Your MIND is your weapon. Use it to take you places. Else, remain the miserable, hopeless, rejected person that no one wants to associate with.

xoxo

Lindah

HOW TO WASH & CARE FOR YOUR LINGERIE

Yes, yes, lingerie!!!

I am talking about Bras, vests, underwear (panties, boxers, briefs, tangas, thongs, G-strings, jocks, shorts, body suits), sleep wear, swim wear, etc. These constitute the most important part of your wardrobe.

Trust me, if the whole world saw you in a dazzling Versace red gown and it accidentally got ripped, would you be proud to show off your lingerie or you would embarrassingly take off to the bathroom to hide it? Many people do not give attention to their undergarments. Gone are the days when lingerie was considered very confidential and un-mentionable. Today, everybody invests in lingerie. It gives you comfort and covers up those very crucial and sensitive parts of your body. It is often shown to our spouses and can determine whether you’re a clean and sexy character or not. Your spouse can actually tell who you are by the lingerie you wear. So, Lingerie can define you. So, if you wanna look hot, clean and sexy for your spouse, you gotta learn how to care for your lingerie. Follow me and I will show you.

  1. First of all, you need to always read the tags on your lingerie to know the type of fabric, how to wash it and dry it. Cotton lingerie, if not treated well, can lose shape and fade out. Silk lingerie can easily tear. These tags will surely guide you.
  2. Wash your lingerie after every wear. This mainly goes the my brothers who wear their ‘boxers’ 5-10 times before they get washed :-). Please please please, endeavour to wash after wear. If you are too lazy, then buy as many undergarments as possible so that you can wash the whole week’s wear over the weekend.
  3. Take time to soak your lingerie in good gentle soft washing powder for about 20-30min before you can do the actual hand washing.
  4. Do not mix up your lingerie. Sort and wash them according to their colours to avoid stains.
  5. Hang your lingerie out in the sun (not the burning sun) instead of inside your dark crowded bathroom. The sun is the no. 1 natural pesticide for all the germs and pests that get into our clothes. Secondly, your lingerie will dry up faster than remaining damp for 2 days in your bathroom.
  6. Avoid ironing your lingerie. Only iron those like cotton vests. Else, you will spoil them. If you want your lingerie straightened, then make sure you stretch it out to remove any wrinkles before hanging it out in the sun.
  7. Ladies, please make use of the panty-liners. These come in handy especially during those ovulation days when you tend to stain the light coloured lingerie. You wouldn’t want your lingerie to get that funny colour that wasn’t originally there.
  8. Find a good, clean, cockroach-free slot in your wardrobe for keeping your lingerie. Since it covers your sensitive body parts, it is important that it is kept very clean.
  9. Breastfeeding mothers should wear breast pads to avoid staining their bras. You wouldn’t want the people next to you to complain about the milk smell.
  10. Last but not least, dispose off your underwear at least every six months. Yes, I know we all have those favourite panties and bras that we never want to let go of but if you wear them for long, they seize to do their job well, e.g. an old bra can make your breasts sag, thus damaging their size.

Well, well, I hope all you garlies and dudies out their are gonna take care of your lingerie more than you’ve been doing. Remember, it can define you.

Love always, Lindiwe.

BEAUTY OR BRAINS???

Hello my dear life jugglers, hope y’all doing great. I must confess that I have been too busy and probably lazy (but read the busy part :-)) to update the blog but please pardon me. Blame the many things that I have to do and the very many ideas that run through my mind everyday.

So buddies, first tell me something. You know I have heard lots of people arguing about Beauty vs Brains (which one can take you places and probably heights?) The recent one is our very own Sharon O, the Ugandan Representative in the BigBrother Africa house. She has survived several evictions and word has it that beauty has made her survive. Wow! sounds interesting. I agree that she is a very beautiful woman. But very many intelligent and interesting housemates were evicted. Does that make beauty better than brains?

Or come to remember the last year’s Tusker Project Fame Rwandese representative called Gaelle whose voice just failed to meet the required standards but hey, East Africa always wanted to see her beauty for several weeks. She kept in the academy for 90% of the time. Does that make beauty better than brains?

Let’s carry out a very short and simple analysis of the two and eventually you’ll let me know which one works for you; ahem.

Beauty

  • It can be natural or created. Anyone can look beautiful if they choose to.
  • The definition of beauty differs from one person to another. To some, it is the eyes, to others, it is the facial expressions, to others, it is the round hips and big bottoms while to others, it is the hair. You will never understand beauty. It lies in the eyes of the beholder. Yes it does. What is pleasant to my eyes might be hideous to yours.
  • Beauty surely fades. I know many of us never want to hear this but hey, why are there so many beauty products on the market? It’s because beauty surely fades. A 27 years old look is very different from that of 50 years. That is why women and men struggle so hard to keep young (eating healthy food, exercising, smiling, surgery and of course not forgetting the saving beauty products on the market). Very simple factors can affect one’s beauty, e.g. stress may cause pimples, an accident may deform one’s face or even make them lame, an acid attack can make one blind, etc. So if beauty fades, do you think it will always bail you out?

Brains

  • Brains too are natural and can also be created through reading books, research, consultation, etc. Anyone can be intelligent if they work hard at it.
  • Brains are brains. Unlike beauty, they are just that. You’re either intelligent or daft. The definition of brains doesn’t differ from one person to another.
  • Unless your brain has been damaged by probably a car accident or a terrible tumour, brains never fade. An intelligent person will always be intelligent whether they are 27 or 50 years old, whether they are stressed or not, whether they have had an acid attack or not, etc. People will always use them as a source of wisdom. Can I hear an ‘AMEN’? lol.

So, with my simple analysis, tell me what works for you. As for me, it has always been Brains. I believe they work for me and they will take me places. That’s why I read so much because I want to know and know and know. However, I am also blessed with beauty (haters, please don’t hit me on this one :-)), so I guess with these two, I will go places and heights. Think, think, I am waiting for your options.

Big hug!!!!

Lindiwe

NATURAL OR ARTIFICIAL

Every woman tries their level best to look beautiful, smart, sexy and sassy. She will do lots of things to enhance her looks; hair extensions, fake eyebrows, fake eyelashes, artificial nails, push-up bras, bum-enhancers, hip-extensions, just name it.

Fake eyelashes

Artificial Nails. They do look good but natural beats them all.

My question is, do men appreciate natural or artificial looks? Frankly speaking, we often dress up for the men to see and appreciate God’s creation :-) Don’t we?

Ok, if you disagree with me and claim that you dress up to feel good and appreciate yourself, then the question is; “Do you like it natural or artificial?”

How on earth does someone wear artificial everything? To me, if I met a guy who had an artificial appearance, then I would straight away conclude that he is not honest and true to himself.

They may look nice but they are not yours.

He is not proud of who he is. It is fine to try and make that ‘ugly’ part of your body look beautiful but there are beings that lie about their physical appearance right from the hair to the toes.What happens when you meet your guy, looking all sexy and making him salivate as he gasps for breath but later on, he realizes that you were wearing a bum-enhancer, a push-up bra and the nails are actually not real? I guess he will smile but inwardly, he will wonder if you are the right person for him.

Sanyu's natural look makes me melt. It is true beauty.

I always believe that true beauty is always natural. You do not force a smile, it i s natural.  The natural flawless skin beats all the Mac make-up products that several women  praise each day. Created beauty looks lovely but it never lasts. Natural is always there for all to see it.

True to herself :-)

I think we need to be true to ourselves and appreciate what God blessed us with. We all have a unique feature that makes us stand out of the crowd. To some, it is the smile, others, the hair, others the hips, just name it. We are all special in one way or another and therefore should not struggle to look like other people.

Personally, I don’t mind a little makeup (only if it retains your natural look) and push-up bras. But Artificial nails, artificial eyelashes and brows and hip  extensions are not an option for me.

Looking at the images below, don’t you think natural is the way to go?

Natural eyebrows. you just need to shape them

Natural Eyelashes. If you want them longer, use a little mascara.

Neat natural nails. Love them.

THEY CALL IT CORPORATE GOSSIP

I am one of the most fortunate people in the world. I work for a company that is comprised of 96% men and 4% women. One would imagine my company to have no rumors, no drama, no gossip, except for politics and football. But alas, that aint true. These days both men and women love to gossip. It goes right from the saloons, to the bars, to the markets, to homes, to offices and I guess even in the toilets. Trees, walls, fences all have ears.

But what annoys me most is when gossip at the workplace goes to the extent of destroying somebody’s reputation that they have taken years to build. Why on earth would someone want to know about my personal life; who I date, what I eat, what places I hang out in, where I shop, where I live, how I spend my weekends, etc and then use all these to impress the boss so that they get promoted and you demoted. Most people just do not know how much damage gossip can cause in a workplace. It destroys teamwork, relationships, focus, causes depression and above all, affects productivity. Unfortunately, most of these rumours turn out to be largely false. Most of them are concoctions to destroy others. Struggling with corporate gossips, here’s how to deal with it:

  1. Never engage in gossip. We are all humans and we all gossip at some point. Clean your house before you clean your neighbour’s. Or, let’s use the bible quote that we are all familiar with, “Remove the log in your eye before you look out for the spark in mine.” If you avoid gossip, then people will have no reason to gossip about you.
  2. If one of your colleagues comes to you with a string of hot words, just let them know that you are not interested in anything that doesn’t build you and destroys others. Before you listen, ask them what they are gonna talk about and if it is nonsense, then ask them to leave.
  3. Avoid hanging out with colleagues a lot. When you spend a lot of time with people, they get to learn all your manners. So, when you spend a lot of time with colleagues, you give them the leeway to talk about you.
  4. You need to realize that we spend 80% of our lives at the workplace so it is very important that you are stress-free at your workplace. If 80% of your life is stressed, then you’re bound to suffer heart disease.
  5. This is one recipe that people do not believe yet it works. Be at your workplace for only the time you’re required to be there. 8am – 5pm, then go and get a life. Do other things to relax your mind. Instead of staying at the workplace looking for gossip, go play a game or watch a movie. Try as much as possible to avoid the gossipers.
  6. Last but not least, identify the top corporate gossipers and warn everyone about them. But be sure this wont cause any hullabaloo. Let the gossipers know that you are aware of them. They will slowly give up the habit.

Get a life. Care about the log in your eye before you look out for the spark in mine.

Big love

Lindiwe

A NEW YEAR!

Yesterday 27/06/11, I made 27 years of age. I am so grateful to God for all His blessings, for family, for friends and for the gift of life. It is not something I take for granted. I feel too old now. Gone are the days when you would be asked your age and you proudly scream “21” but now, all you say is, “am older” lol. Anyway, am proud to be 27 now.

Speaking of age, I think I want a baby. I was talking to a friend of mine called Kyommey and I was telling her of my maternal instincts and how much I was craving for a baby. Seriously, I do not know where this urge is from but my hormones tell me I need one. So, watch this space – next year, you might see a bumpy stomach :-)

Anyway, thanks to my family and all my friends who made my day and big thanks to my gorgeous fiancee that filled me with surprises.

xoxo

Lindah

APPRECIATION

One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company.
He passed the first interview, the director did the last interview, made the last decision.

The director discovered from the CV that the youth’s academic achievements were excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never had a year when he did not score.

The director asked, “Did you obtain any scholarships in school?” the youth answered “none”.

The director asked, ” Was it your father who paid for your school fees?” The youth answered, “My father passed away when I was one year old, it was my mother who paid for my school fees.

The director asked, ” Where did your mother work?” The youth answered, “My mother worked as clothes cleaner. The director requested the youth to show his hands. The youth showed a pair of hands that were smooth and perfect.

The director asked, ” Have you ever helped your mother wash the clothes before?” The youth answered, “Never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books. Furthermore, my mother can wash clothes faster than me.

The director said, “I have a request. When you go back today, go and clean your mother’s hands, and then see me tomorrow morning.

The youth felt that his chance of landing the job was high. When he went back, he happily requested his mother to let him clean her hands. His mother felt strange, happy but with mixed feelings, she showed her hands to the kid.

The youth cleaned his mother’s hands slowly. His tear fell as he did that. It was the first time he noticed that his mother’s hands were so wrinkled, and there were so many bruises in her hands. Some bruises were so painful that his mother shivered when they were cleaned with water.

This was the first time the youth realized that it was this pair of hands that washed the clothes everyday to enable him to pay the school fee. The bruises in the mother’s hands were the price that the mother had to pay for his graduation, academic excellence and his future.

After finishing the cleaning of his mother hands, the youth quietly washed all the remaining clothes for his mother.

That night, mother and son talked for a very long time.

Next morning, the youth went to the director’s office.

The Director noticed the tears in the youth’s eyes, asked: ” Can you tell me what have you done and learned yesterday in your house?”

The youth answered, ” I cleaned my mother’s hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining clothes’

The Director asked, ” please tell me your feelings.”

The youth said, Number 1, I know now what is appreciation. Without my mother, there would not be the successful me today. Number 2, by working together and helping
my mother, only I now realize how difficult and tough it is to get something done. Number 3, I have come to appreciate the importance and value of family relationship.

The director said, ” This is what I am looking for to be my manager.
I want to recruit a person who can appreciate the help of others, a person who knows the sufferings of others to get things done, and a person who would not put money as his only goal in life. You are hired.

Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates. Every employee worked diligently and as a team. The company’s performance improved tremendously.

A child, who has been protected and habitually given whatever he wanted, would develop “entitlement mentality” and would always put himself first. He would be ignorant of his parent’s efforts. When he starts work, he assumes that every person must listen to him, and when he becomes a manager, he would never know the sufferings of his employees and would always blame others. For this kind of people, who may be good academically, may be successful for a while, but eventually would not feel sense of achievement. He will grumble and be full of hatred and fight for more. If you are this kind of protective parents, are you really showing love or are you destroying the kid instead?

You can let your kid live in a big house, eat a good meal, learn piano, watch a big screen TV. But when you are cutting grass, please let them experience it. After a meal, let them wash their plates and bowls together with their brothers and sisters. It is not because you do not have money to hire a maid, but it is because you want to love them in a right way. You want them to understand, no matter how rich their parents are, one day their hair will grow gray, same as the mother of that young person. The most important thing is your kid learns how to appreciate the effort and experience the difficulty and learns the ability to work with others to get things done.

WHEN THE WRONG ONE LOVES YOU RIGHT

What do you do when you fall in the hands of someone who loves you wholeheartedly? He is willing to give up the whole world just to make you happy. He just loves you right!!!! Respects your opinion no matter how wrong it can be, gives up all his schedules just to spend time with you, loses touch with his friends just to be with you and above all, sweeps you off your feet; – if you know what I mean. BUT you just don’t feel the person. You instead get angry with all these good things that he does for you. None of them amuses you whatsoever. He loves you right but he is the wrong one.

Or have you fallen in the claws of this guy that drives you crazy? His big muscles make your heart melt, his smile takes your breath away, he’s got a warm hug and a pleasant scent, his lips are the kind to die for, he’s handsome, brilliant, articulate, presentable, assertive and sentimental. He is the man of your dreams. BUT sweetie, he doesn’t love you right. You don’t matter so much to him. Your presence or absence in his life do not matter much. He is a good and the right man but he just doesn’t love you right. hmmmm…… crazy world we live in.

What do you do? Well, I have no answer to this question but I think it is better to go with someone who loves and treasures you than clinging on to a person that will make you suffer all your life.

xoxo

Lindah

SO YOU THINK YOU CAN PULL IT OFF?

Ok, I am not trying to be a hater but look here, at the 2011 Billboard Music Awards, some people surely pulled it off and others……………. NAY!!!!!! They totally lost it. What do you guys think?

Bootylicious Beyonce. This was my BEST. I love everything. SIMPLE, SEXY & SMART. You surely pulled it off Lady B.

Crazy Britney & Riri, too much flesh but that's normal for both of you. I don't mind.

Hillary Scott and the band members, YAY!!!! i LOVE Hillary's look. the shoes :-)

Yay Justin Bieber & JayZ. You totally rocked.

Yay Miss Kelly Rowland. You rocked. Next time though, pliz expose your pretty face.

Nicki Minaj, you were my worst. NAY!!!! Try harder.

Great couple. Keith Urban really pulled it off. Nicole Kidman, too simple.

Yay Randy Jackson, you always pull it off. I like.

Riri, apart from the hair, I love the look! Sweet!

Nay Selena Gomez! That outfit was too much for your age. Opt for something a little younger next time.

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